Oliver is nursery ready and has been for a while now, but because of our financial situation, we just couldn’t afford to send him (child care is expensive!). Oliver is an extremely intelligent and advanced child, he was climbing before he could crawl, he was crawling at 4/5months and walking at 10months, there is no stopping this child. He is really confident and social, he loves meeting new people and I know he will fit right in at nursery. Not only that but he is very independent and has never been a clingy baby, so I know that he won’t have a problem going off and doing his own thing.
That aside, here are a few of my pre-nursery thoughts and feelings..
Guilt- I have read a few posts and talked to a few people and they all say that this is completely normal. As his mum, I’m going to feel so guilty leaving him with new people and not taking care of him myself. I have a feeling that this will reside as he gets to know the staff and children and they become a normal part of his life. Another question that arises is, what if he cries when I leave him? How will I react? Will I feel fine, knowing that it won’t last and he is safe, or will I panic and feel bad?! Or infact what if the total opposite happens, and he doesn’t cry when I leave? Will I be happy and releved that he is happy and sure of where he is or will I feel as if he doesn’t care? Selfish I know! And most of all, what if he doesn’t like going to nursery? But he has to go in order for me to go to college, will I feel guilty dropping him off every morning?
Nervous- I’m such an anxious mum, not in the sense that I keep Oliver from doing things, but in the sense I check his windows are closed three times before he sleeps, I panic if he goes quiet for to long or I can’t see him when he is playing in the garden (ducking down, hiding behind the shed). So what if he has an accident at nursery and I’m not there? I’m going to feel awful that I wasn’t there to comfort him or prevent it!
Jealousy- Now this is my biggest pre-nursery fear! I cannot stand the thought of someone taking care of Oliver or seeing him more than me. What if he comes to prefer being with his teachers than me? Since he has been born, other than sleep overs with nanas, me and nathan have been the only ones to ever look after him so handing over a little part of that is going to take a lot of getting used to!
On a more positive note… I’m excited!
Im excited to see Oliver spread his wings, to do his own thing, to grow and learn new things! I can’t wait to see his already amazing character change and develop, to watch others make an impression on him, and for him to make friends and for him to share his cheekiness with them. I’m looking forward to the first time he brings me home a picture and to know that he is out there making things on his own and he is discovering himself outside of the family unit.
Let’s wait and see…